Understanding Grief

Though shared with all humanity, loss and grief remain intimately our own. Taking into consideration the variables that shape the experience of loss and grief fosters understanding of any loss that may occur in our life. Understanding the variables that influence grief can meaningfully guide us through our mourning. Despite the universal quality, loss and grief are never generic.

Many variables personalize grief. Reflect upon the ways losses have their individual circumstances and qualities, and are experientially distinct from each other. Consider what in particular you need to mourn. Loss and grief are universally human, but each and every loss is once in a lifetime. Never underestimate the uniqueness of any loss. Include mourning for the specific qualities of the person and your relationship with them.

The following pages: Timing and Circumstances; Personal and Relationship Variables; and Culture and Religion provide more about the variables that personalize grief.